How to Break Social Media Addiction
What are the root causes of social media addiction?
Don’t you hate social media? I’d had it with crying, stupid tiktok dance videos, fake news, and a glamorized life pestering all over my feed. Still, here I am trying to break my social media addiction and using the power of the internet to dive well into this topic.
Well…isn’t that ironic?
No matter how much we hate it or how many social media detox we have to take, social media has now become an integral part of our lives. As humans, it’s in our nature to crave connection to feel good and thrive.
Yet in today’s digital age, the central question remains: Are we now in danger of serious digital overload, stress, and burnout? Does social media shape the way people think? Is it dumbing us down as a society? And if so, how can we take control again of our lives?
THE LONELIEST GENERATION
In a world that is hyper-connected, why do we feel so disconnected and lonelier than ever before?
A study conducted by the American Journal of Preventive Medicine states that people who are frequently online are more likely to be socially isolated compared to those who are less online. Studies have shown that social media addiction links to depression, lower self-esteem, and anxiety.
FIRST THINGS FIRST……
Let’s ask ourselves, WHY do we use social media?
Are we just looking for validation or are we rooting for a deep sense of connection?
Or perhaps there’s no deep reason behind it, just pure boredom and apathy.
I, myself have an understanding of UX design, and online marketing psychology and am a trained optimizer- there are times that I’m glued to my phone. And if I’m being honest, my work break is social media, checking every 2 hours on break and even before going to sleep.
But at what point one should ask themselves: “Am I addicted to social media? Is my life now revolving around it?”
First, let’s define addiction:
With that being said, addiction is a RESULT of coping mechanisms to deal with stress.
Our environment such as relationships i.e. friends and family, our overall life satisfaction, and how we view ourselves are important factors in how we can be addicted to it. In this context, social media became a form of escapism.
For some, their psychology could be the root cause, but I do believe that a huge reason for social media addiction is due to its nature.
The book called “Hooked” by Nir Eyal explains a four-step cyclical process that aims to create a successful habit-forming product. The four steps are called- Trigger, Action, Variable reward, and Investment.
Social media apps are using this model that’s why it’s so addictive.
- The first step called “Trigger” is divided into 2 factors: Internal and external. External are email notifications such as reminders, paid advertising, retargeting, etc. while Internal Triggers are our feelings and emotions such as boredom or sadness.
- After “Trigger”, we move to the 2nd step called “Action”. These are actions such as opening the app, liking, posting content, commenting, and watching videos.
- Now, let’s go to the 3rd step “Variable reward”. This is the sudden dopamine spark that we experience using the app; this is when we feel validated or perhaps connected. These are small prizes we gain when someone likes or interacts with our posts, gets new followers; or internal rewards such as boredom gone, happiness, fun, inspiration etc.
- In the last step “Investment” comes in the forms of data, effort, subscription, or even money. In the end, the app will have good meaning for you, a valid reason to use the product over and over again. The more someone uses the product repeatedly, the more likely she will be to “self-trigger.”
All these things are the nature of a hyper-connected Internet – there’s nothing you can do to change these characteristics. So is the best solution to disconnect, delete the social apps, and live in the mountains?
Maybe it’s time to accept it as part of our everyday lives and instead of hating or blaming it- we stop playing the victim and put power into our own hands.
FORMULATING GOOD HABITS
“A change in bad habits leads to a change in your life.”
I’m a sucker for formulating habits. Every time I move to a new place or start a new chapter of my life or when my working schedule changes, writing my daily routine and to-do lists on a small piece of paper excites me.
What I learned when breaking a habit is to NOT REMOVE it but rather REPLACE it. You see when we try to completely remove a habit (smoking, drinking, snacking, etc.), we build resentment into ourselves or to people asking us to change. After all, there’s a saying that goes “What you resist, persist.”
So how do we replace toxic social media habits? By going deeper into ourselves and going beyond the surface:
STARVE YOUR CRAVINGS
The main purpose of social media is a connection but why do we crave more if we have people in our lives who are always there for us from day one? Sometimes, we take for granted what we already have for something that we perceive as shinier or better.
Figure out your most important relationships:
- Who are the people that are most important to you?
- Who brings out the best in you?
- Who drains your energy?
Yes, I found amazing people, clients, and friends on social media but I’m not mindlessly prying on other people’s business and most certainly not replacing my current relationships. Rather my intention is clear→ JOINING A COMMUNITY to improve, expand my network and provide value.
BEAT THE F.O.M.O
Competition is a thief of joy. I have one rule in social media and that is do not compare someone’s curated feed to your life. Influencers have social media managers and content calendars- it is their job!
Instead, know more about yourself and determine your values in life. Your values are your guide through challenging times. It gives you clarity and direction in where or who you want to be in the future.
Are you missing something if what you’re seeing in your social media feed is not your goal in your life right now or in 5 years? I don’t think so.
Fear of Missing Out is an emotional response, at its root, FOMO can be a lack of self-awareness. When a person lacks values in life and is not living intentionally, they will look for ways to avoid confronting themselves- turning to social media as a status symbol.
ALIGNMENT IS THE KEY
“Vulnerability is based on mutuality and requires boundaries and trust. It’s not oversharing, it’s not purging, it’s not indiscriminate disclosure, and it’s not celebrity-style social media information dumps. Vulnerability is about sharing our feelings and our experiences with people who have earned the right to hear them.” -Brene Brown
Social media gives us incredible power to share our opinion on certain topics, start a movement or share our knowledge. I struggled with this even today hence before posting or giving unsolicited advice, I’ll always ask myself WHY 2x.
What is the purpose of me posting this?
- Is it to provide Value?
- Is it just my passion?
- Am I looking for validation?
- Maybe monetization?
- Or maybe it’s just fun, there is no deep reason behind it.
We might not like the answer but sticking to our big WHY always keeps us in check.
Today’s superpower is to be focused on what we truly want in life and let go of distractions. CLARITY IS POWER.
SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
Saying no is important. Having healthy boundaries around technology is a must or else it will surely take over our lives. Let’s have an honest conversation about ourselves-
How do we spend our time on social media?
In setting healthy boundaries, I BLOCK (including people lol) and REMOVE.
BLOCK:
Morning is important to me. That’s why I am disciplined in not using social media at this time of the day.
- Block time in using social media
- Block time on replying to emails
- Block negative energy including toxic people and trolls
REMOVE:
When the apps know your every move and what sparks your interest, I claim my power back and remove distractions.
- Silent notifications
- Stop ads from showing (3 buttons)
- Use automation for replying to emails and social media automation tools for scheduling.
JOIN THE GOOD SIDE
Use the power of Good Technology and make it work for you. Here are some of my favorites good for tech apps:
“AntiSocial is a clever reporting app that allows you to take control and compare your smartphone usage.”
“Flipd is a time tracking app that encourages you to stay motivated toward your goals”
“Become more productive, stop wasting time, stay laser focused & avoid distractions online. Stop wasting your time and become more productive by avoiding distracting websites.”
“Time tracking that’s easy, powerful, and frictionless”
“Work anytime, anywhere with this project management tool. Keep remote and distributed teams, and your entire organization, focused on their goals, projects, and tasks.”
Asana is my favorite project management tool (I used almost all of them). Their calendar feature and the user interface are unbeatable.
Technology changed our lives and it will continue until the next year or so. Either be beaten by it or claim our power back by using it in a more purpose-driven and balanced way.
I would love to hear your thoughts! How are you using social media intentionally?
